Erotic Nights of the Living Dead

Dir: Joe D’Amato, 1980

1/10

erotic_nights_of_living_dead_poster_02

This review is of the uncut version.

Let’s be honest. Joe D’Amato was not a good director. Of anything. Ever.

The plot has something to do with a black cat and zombies, with hardcore porn sprinkled liberally about the place.

I was bored shitless watching this. There is not one smidgen of interest, here.

The porn is bland and not in the least bit exciting. It’s so mundane and totally ill fitting of its title.

Rarely have I heard more ridiculous and unintentionally funny dialogue.

Porn is not meant to be believable, and stars people that can’t act. Scripts are always flimsy and short.

But Erotic Nights of the Living Dead (or Sexy Nights of the Living Dead as the on-screen credit shows) just takes the mick.

As well as being a porno, the film is also a horror (at least that’s what it tries to be). The “effects” are so cringingly awful, they make Ed Wood look like Stan Winston.

It truly is a terrible film. 

D’Amato never directed one good film in his entire career. The only film that I can think of, which reaches anywhere near watchable, is Caligula 2: The Untold Story, and even that’s a stretch.

Hopelessly long, the film feels like it’s been on ages when, in fact, it’s only been on about twenty minutes.

You’ll be checking your watch more times during this, than you would in the course of an entire day.

Boring, insipid, dire. Give it a miss.

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